Speaking Up: How to talk to lost loved ones

I admit it. I'm being totally stubborn.

I'm facing a big decision, and I really need my mother's words of wisdom. But instead of talking to her, I'm stuck in a cycle of feeling angry, frustrated, and mopey. The smallest thing will send me into a fit (just ask my poor boyfriend, who gets the brunt of it!).

This happened to me once before, over the summer. I invited all my relatives to my new apartment and cooked a big feast. But all morning and all that day, I couldn't shake the disappointment that my mom wouldn't be there. It was only later, when I talked to her in my head, that I realized she was there--just in a different way.

Now I need to find the strength to let go of the anger and talk to her again.

How do you let go of frustration? What helps? Running? Yoga? Religion? Therapy? I'm open to trying anything at this point!